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Posted on by Kaz B

Oooh Vicar!
Q1

Kaz, I’m 35 and have been married to my husband for 15 years. About a year ago I stumbled across a fetish forum and what started out as curiosity has now spiralled into an addiction. Now when my husband is out at work my kinky side can’t wait to escape and I love to dress as a man and whip submissive men. My husband is a priest so you can imagine the implications involved. Should I come clean?

Angela, Hampshire.

 

Dear Angela,

 

If this was under any other circumstances I would advise that you come clean to your husband. However, this doesn’t sound like the typical kind of scenario. The first thing that concerns me is not that you are experimenting with fetish, but the fact that you use the word ‘addiction’. If something is taking over your life whether it be sex, drugs, food or fetish and to the extent that it is likely to cause dysfunction within your relationships, then it is not healthy and I advise you seek out therapy for your addiction. Rather than feed the addiction, find out why you feel that your life is lacking and focus on improving your relationships and lifestyle.

 

The other point that concerns me is that fact that your husband is a priest. If you tell him about what you have been practising  and continue this lifestyle, it may have a devastating impact on his career if it is found out that he knew about this.

 

I think you need to decide which is more important to you in this instance. Is it your relationship with your husband or the fetish? Only you can decide that. If your relationship is worth fighting for, then seek some professional counselling and remove your online fetish profiles. A trained counsellor may also be able to advise on how you can enrich your sex life with your partner, rather than turning to strangers to fulfil your needs.

 

What a load of balls!

Q2

Hello Miss,

This is a bit embarrassing but I am a 50 year old fellow with a penchant for ballbusting and I hire young ladies to brutalise my genitals. After a particularly extreme session the other week, I find that I am still terribly sore and the slightest tap has me yelping in pain. I’ve tried ice cubes and savlon but nothing seems to help the old crown jewels! Please help a fellow out!

William

 

Dear William,

 

First let’s deal with helping your crown jewels return to their former glory! For bruising I would suggest using Arnica cream which will help bring down the swelling and heal your bits and pieces more quickly. An anti-inflammatory such as Ibuprofen may bring you some pain relief, as will a nice ice pack wrapped tightly in a towel and applied to the sensitive area.

 

Now to ensure that your nethers don’t find themselves in such a sorry state after future antics, I have a few suggestions. When you are in the act, try a few different positions such as bending over or sitting with your legs in the air so that the same area is not subjected to trauma each time. Take regular breaks when necessary and if your ballbusting partner wears shoes, ask them to swap these for trainers or even better, go barefoot. I suggest you allow yourself to heal fully before engaging in extreme play again and make sure you and your playmate agree a safe word so that you can cease play if the pain is becoming too much.

 

What a jolly good Sport!

Q3

Dear Kaz

 

I have collected 150 copies of The Sport and can’t find a women to wrap me up in it. Please help! I am desperate to make my fantasy come try.

 

Ekiboo, 49

 

Dear Ekiboo

 

What a fun and naughty fantasy. That must have taken a great deal of dedication to collect 150 papers and it’s only right that you should reap the rewards. I suggest you Google a club called Eureka in Dartford, Kent. It’s a safe haven for fetishists and swingers and there are ladies there  who would love to indulge your fetish and wrap you up nice and securely with your newspapers. Enjoy and let me know how you get on!

 

Hanky Panky, Nothing like a good spanky!

Q4

Hey Kaz,

 

After watching 50 Shades of Grey I’m really keen to try spanking. Should I tell my lesbian partner and how can I tentatively persuade her to spank me?

Alyssa X 29

 

Dear Alyssa,

 

Spanking can be a great deal of fun and a good addition to a healthy sex life. It’s great that you are wanting to experiment with your partner and yes I think you should bite the bullet and suggest it to her. First of all set the scene, run her a bath then put on some soft music and pour some champagne, Give her a massage then when she is nice and relaxed you could broach the subject and say you saw a spanking scene in a film and thought it might be fun to try. After all your hard work she should find it almost impossible to resist your suggestion.

 

Think about how you want to be spanked, sensual and slow or do you want you partner to be more firm? Gently coax her, make some soft moans when she is getting it just right and keep it fun and playful. Enjoy!

I hope you enjoyed reading my column. To follow more of my adventures, check out my fetish site www.uk-fetish.co.uk and you can also follow me on Twitter. www.twitter.com/kazbxx

Send your questions to AGONY@DAILYSPORT.CO.UK

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