2018 – A year of Decadence

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So welcome to my first column of 2018, I can already tell it’s going to be a Decadence kind of year!

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Our year began with the last party of 2017 and the first of 2018. As you know due to some last minute issues, we joined Eureka Lifestyle Club down in Kent for their Glitz and Glamour event. They laid on a massive buffet, welcome drinks and a midnight toast. The venue was brilliant with an extended smoking area and licensed bar. We even had Glamour photographers in-house for those who wished to have their photographs taken. Privacy is, of course, of paramount importance to us and as such we are unable to share any of the photos, they were purely for the individuals who wished to have them.

The night, of course, went without a hitch and the free transfer to and from the hotel was very useful to many guests.
The party started at 8 with the usual queue at the gate to get in, car parking was well marshalled as they were expecting in excess of 400 revellers and the clubhouse was fabulously decorated by the team with no expense spared. Staff and security seemed to be everywhere making us all feel very safe, but then that’s normal here and what you expect at such a well run club. The DJ kept the tunes pumping all night and the dance floor soon filled up with people throwing their heart and soul into the evening. At about 10 the dance floor thinned and people retired to the restrooms for some r and r though this didn’t make it feel any less busy as but by this time the tables had all filled and the atmosphere was electric. The time just flew by and before we knew it Cream and his partner were rapping us into the New Year. The countdown started and the New Year was beckoned in with confetti cannons and a balloon drop, then the fireworks went off, in more ways than one …(wink wink)
Once we had finished toasting in 2018 the party really started to move up a gear and the restrooms were heaving! The buffet had nearly all gone and the bar was serving more jaeger bombs than I could drink in an evening, the rest, as they say, is history…or at least a gentleman couldn’t possibly divulge!

Thanks to all the team at Eureka for helping us out at short notice and to our sponsors Darkside Magazine, Adult Genie and Daily Sport. Here’s to the next party and a year of Decadence.

How can I help you this year?

Hi Dr
My boyfriend and I have been discussing using a strap-on, we are both into the idea but apprehensive. Is it safe and are there any tips you can give us?
Thanks
G

Hi G,
First of all, using a strap-on is nothing at all to be scared of! The great thing is there are so many different styles and sizes on the market so depending on your dong of choice, you can start off small, then work your way up to a bigger size once your boyfriend gets more comfortable and used to it!
As with all anal play, the key to success is lube! There’s no such thing as too much. Make sure you are both in the mood and turned on, don’t put pressure on yourselves and work up to it. Also remember, the anus is a muscle, so it needs to be warmed up first (just like before you exercise!), so maybe use a finger or two, anal beads or a small vibrator such as a bullet, to get things going, and to get your boyfriend used to the sensation.
Once you’ve become more comfortable with using strap-ons, the world is your oyster! The male p spot (prostate) is located in the anus and stimulating this will give your man mind-blowing orgasms. There are special strap-ons designed to perfectly target this area. There’s also strapless strap-ons, or double-ended, which give pleasure to the both of you, so everyone’s a winner!

Dear Dr
I’d like to try being more dominant towards my husband and try some role play, but I’ve got no idea where to start. I’ve heard of Mistresses and subs and we like the sound of that. I’m scared of making myself look silly!
K

Hi K
First of all, don’t worry and have fun with it! Do you want to start off small like tying hubby to the bed during sex or go the whole Mistress/sub hog? If you want to dive straight in then perhaps the best place to start would be to create your persona – sometimes making up an alter ego can help you to feel less awkward about the new experience. Whatever helps you feel more confident – some sexy lingerie, latex, or even a wig – put it on and enjoy playing make-believe! Take some inspiration from empowering women and other Dommes, you will find many on Twitter, join Facebook groups related to the subject and ask questions, do your research. Decide what kind of Domme you want to be, are you a Mistress, a Goddess, a Princess, or something else entirely? Ensure you feel happy, confident and comfortable whatever you choose.
As for where to start, there are many beginners bondage kits and couples bondage kits you could try or maybe just pick one item such as a riding crop or paddle, to begin with. Make sure you discuss all aspects with hubby first and know his/your limits and safe words. If you want to bring the dominance out of the bedroom, you could create tasks for him to do, and if they aren’t completed to your standards – a punishment is due!
The chances are, that if you’re enjoying what you’re doing, you won’t look silly at all! If you’re not feeling it, don’t do it! – and that goes for both Dominants and submissives. Have fun and maintain honest and open communication.

Until next time, keep those questions coming and stay decadent. Email dr.decadence@dailysport.co.uk

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