Life online

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Greetings and salutations my dear kinksters

Recently I have been mulling over how finding love has changed in the age of the information superhighway. After everyone’s initial concern about the safety of internet dating, it surpassed all other modes of meeting the one, or the one for now and become the go-to for singles looking for love or a bit of fun. Move on ten years and we have come full circle, we are now in an age of enlightenment, social media and online platforms have gone through their infancy, battled through the turbulent teen years and emerged a more rounded and more cynical young adult. With this growth has come the knowledge of catfishing, scamming, phishing, keyboard warriors and online bullying. Instead of these pushing people back out of their comfort zones and out in the world, it appears to have been the catalyst for relationships not only formed online but conducted online also. People form alliances and friendship circles with individuals from all over the world who they are never likely to meet in real life and through these connections, they are operating entirely online lives. Does this mean that one day in the future we will go days without actually speaking to or seeing another person without the aid of technical equipment and apps? Let’s hope not! Go out this week, talk to people in person, meet new people without your filtered photos and remember that there is a life outside of the internet.

Make sure to get your club and party reviews coming in, tell the world which are the best and worst swinging and BDSM venues that you have attended. Maybe you have found a hidden gem or have been disappointed by a well-known location, either way, tell the rest of the community.

“My boyfriend and I are completely new to the fetish world and have been toying with the idea of going to a BDSM club for a while. We live in Birmingham but didn’t want to go anywhere too local. We saw on Twitter about a club called Kink in Dudley so we decided to go there. We went on a Saturday night and it was an amazing night. Everyone seemed to know each other but they were all really friendly and chatty. We took the opportunity to play in the dungeon space and I really enjoyed the voyeur aspect but we retired to a private room to continue our games. It was a great night and we will certainly go back again. MC”

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Surgery is open, how can I help you this week?

 

Dear Dr Decadence

I have just started dating a new guy and on a date in a club recently everyone seemed to know him, all these girls were coming up and kissing his cheek and we were invited into the VIP area. I was really confused and asked him about it, he told me that he is a porn star. To say I was shocked is an understatement. I really like him but I don’t know if I can handle the thought of him with other girls, even though he says it is just a job.

T

Hi T

I can understand how that must have been a bit of a shock for you. It may have seemed like he had been lying to you but I‘m sure it is quite a hard subject to broach in a new relationship. You will need to have a long think about if it is something you can get passed or if it will make you jealous and paranoid in the long run. Have a talk with him also, discuss his job and what activities he partakes in. You said it is a new relationship so if you don’t think it is something that you can deal with then it is best to get out now and use it as a funny anecdote on girly nights out – “the time I unknowingly dated a porn star”. If you can see a future with this man then you will need to find a way to compartmentalise his job away from your relationship. Only you can decide how to proceed though. Do what is best for you and let us know how it goes.

Right then party people, until next time – stay decadent!

Email dr.decadence@dailysport.co.uk

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