In a WORLD EXCLUSIVE your No.1 Daily Sport can reveal that KINKY Bavarian Bakery chain HANDJOB & GRETEL are to open their first UK site later this year in of all places LEAFY commuter belt SURREY.
The BAKER famed for their BALLSACK GINGERBREAD which has taken the continent by storm is on the MARCH with the UK firmly in their sights.
Founder Hans Nobert told DAILY SPORT “We have brought the fun back into baking and will bring our SEXY treats to the British consumer later this year”
But outraged locals have started a petition to get them BANNED with 1 parish councillor who preferred to remain nameless saying “Over my dead body these PERVERTS come to Surrey.”
What next we ask CREAMPIES and CUM-Stard tarts?
Whatever happened to our BRITISH traditions?