69 LAID off as Britain’s last handmade DILDO company goes down

As if the state of the economy wasn’t bad enough due to the pandemic coupled with government mis-management Daily Sport has learned that BRITAIN’S last remaining DILDO factory has closed resulting in 69 job losses.

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Richard Rubber Mfg. of Cheshire was established in 1861 when the boom for RUBBER products took hold and soon diversified to become the BIGGEST rubber COCK moulder in the country, however in recent years due to cheap CHINESE imports they’ve just LIMPED along.

Daily Sport spoke to one of the redundant workers Brenda, known as ‘The Big Dipper’ at work due to being HEAD of dipping the DIDLOS and she told us “I’ve worked here since I left school and it’s the only job I’ve ever had, what else am I trained for other than DICK DIPPING?”

The last DILDO’s rolled off the production line on Friday as owners closed the factory for the last time.

Daily Sport says we need to support BRITISH manufacturing and help struggling SEX TOY makes who due to LOCKDOWN offer a vital product to keep the nations spirits up.