Daily Sport has EXCLUSIVELY learned that a CRACK squad of CSA [Child Support Agency] officials have been working tirelessly during the LOCKDOWN to track down absentee fathers and non-payers.
One such DAD Crispin 34yo from POSH Chelsea in SW London claimed that poor little Rupert wasn’t his even with such a striking family RESEMBLANCE…… What a BABY photo, but he has since been tracked down and FORCED to cough up £30K a year for Rupert’s PUBLIC SCHOOL fees.
A CSA investigator who wanted to remain nameless told Daily Sport “Lockdown has proved invaluable to us, as everyone is at home so, no ESCAPING us now.” With a big GRIN on his face.
Daily Sport tried to contact Crispin but he refused to comment, only to THREATEN the nation’s favourite family NEWSPAPER with lawyers.
Well Crispin it just goes to prove the old saying “You can run, but you can’t hide” is still very true even today.