Wirral W*NKING champion says I’m ready to make a SPLASH in 2021 despite TISSUE shortages across the North West

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5 times WIRRAL wanking champion Terry Tugger speaking EXCLUSIVELY to Daily Sport says “I’m ready to make a SPLASH in 2021.”

The 53yo has also again HIT out at selfish PANIC BUYERS who have made SOFT tissues like GOLD DUSH across Merseyside since the area went into the governments DRACONIAN tier 3 restrictions leaving both PROFESSIONAL and amateur WANKERS with none to train with.

Tugger added “How on earth can we get to the point of being WORLD CLASSS athletes without government intervention and a LOTTERY grant.”

World Waking Federation [WWF] president Wilhelm Whigler speaking to Daily Sport added “If my dream of making WANKING an Olympic sport CUMS to fruition, BRITAIN looks like being left out in the cold so to speak.”

Since the first LOCKDOWN and all the restrictions organizers of the annual WIRRAL WANKING championships have had no funding from both central or local GOVERNMENT and have been left to LIMP along unaided which many online CAMPAIGN groups are calling a TRAVESTY.

Leading professor on Mental Health Professor Shyster recently commissioned a study into DEPRESSION and found that 98% of people who MASTURBATE are less likely to have depression or any form of mental health issues.